The karaoke kingpin even embarked on his annual jet ski joyride that we’ve come to associate with the ushering in of the holiday season. Sadly no cigarette in hand this year!
Though he did refrain from almost mowing down any local 5-year-olds, unlike 2003’s widely-reported “watercraft incident” involving American Idol refugee Justin Guarini (whose “I apologized profusely!” defense failed to resonate with the greater public). Not that Simon would ever let a child or a ticket for “unsafe boat violation” come between him and the perfect wave. Rather, we like to think that he’d just execute one of his epic eye rolls, say “That was a bit terrible, really. Remember these words: You will never be a professional swimmer.” Before riding off while humming the sounds of Il Divo.
(source)
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