Let’s Play Suicide And Politics With Jordan

Do you begin with “JORDAN: MY DRUG AN SUICIDE HELL”, the News of the World’s front-page shocker on how “Rows with Peter drove me to the edge”.

Or do you, in the other hand (surely on the other hand, ed?) plump for the Star on Sunday’s no less sensational front-page headline: “HOUSE OF LORDS – Katie Price to join Government”?

Tricky choice. Perhaps, though, the stories are not so dissimilar. See if you can guess if the following quotes and facts come from the NOTW or the SoS. Let’s play WARDS or LORDS.

Use your knowledge to say if each of the following lines comes from the story of an ill Jordan (WARDS) or a political Jordan (LORDS). Let’s play:

1. “I think I’m dying!”

2. “Jordan says she took drugs but refuses to say it was cocaine”

3. “Jordan’s a party girl”

4. “I’m so ashamed of what happened next. After I’d taken it I thought, ‘This feels good’ and I took some more.” But then the drug took over. “My heart seemed to be racing fast, I felt hot and I began to panic,”

5. “The glamour babe is launching her own Book Club to boost literacy among children”

6. “Jordan insists there was no lesbian romping involved, only 15 minutes gossiping with the girls about fashion and make-up”

7. “My God, that’s it! That’s the end of us!”

8. “Katie, happily married to Peter Andre, has written a series of books including some aimed at children”

9. “Now her bombshell new book’s revelations back up the story of former nanny Becky Gauld, who was sacked in front of millions on the couple’s TV show, The Baby Diaries, for taking a holiday”

10. “I seriously thought, ‘Shall I end it all now? Drive into this wall and kill myself?’”

11. “The Mermaids & Pirates books feature characters Katie the Mermaid and Peter the Pirate”

12. “ Pop star Peter was working on his music in their home studio and sad Jordan went upstairs, telling him that she wanted to try on some outfits”

13. “Go and have a w*** then, because I’m not doing anything!”

Continue reading for the answers…

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