Jennifer Aniston & John Mayer, Sittin' In A Tree

No one saw this coming…Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer? What is happening to Hollywood predictability? Exes Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jessica Simpson don't exactly pave a path to Jennifer Aniston. Let's find out more about this unlikely couple from Dotspotter blogger, MamaPop…

I guess? Supposedly? Huh.

Alrighty then. Guess I'll do the honors...

Dearest Mr. Mayer,

I know you have a reputation of being something of a cassanova and a cad, so I think I speak for all of America -- nay, civilized humanity -- when I say the following to you: dude, this ain't no easy, breezy Jessica Simpson joint. You're messing with America's reigning girl-next-door sweetheart here, who by the by already got her wittle hweart cwushed -- very publicly and dramatically -- by one celebrity super stud. We has sympathies for poor dear Jenny. DO NOT MESS WITH, YA HEAR? WE WILL BURY YOU, DUDE. CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF. kthxbai!

xoxo,
Gossip Lovers Of America

Too harsh? Not harsh enough? I'm accepting edits...

SO ANYWAY, US Magazine reports that Mayer and Aniston

"...lunched together at Michael's restaurant in Miami, Florida Friday.

The actress and the singer then met up for dinner at Casa Tua on South Beach.

"They were affectionate – definitely touchy, feely," a source [said] about their dinner. "The room they ate in was almost empty. They both drank Belinis."

Their lunch "definitely seemed like a date."

 

Hmm. Sounds speculative (ahahahaaaaa! O RLY? US MAGAZINE SPECULATIVE? DO GO ON! snort.), yet definitely suspicious. Yes indeedy, moderately questionable. Sigh. Well, in any case, I for one look forward to Jen finding someone NOT douchebaggy (I'm looking at you, Vince Vaughn) to settle down with. She deserves a little happiness after that heartbreaking and sordid [whisper]Brad and Angelina[/whisper] debacle. Think Johnny boy could be the real thing, or something like it?

Okay, okay, but before we get ahead of ourselves here, let's keep in mind John's not only dated Jessica "Chicken O' The Sea" Simpson recently, but also spent some quality time with Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Love Hewitt in the past. Call me a cynic, but somehow those partner selections just don't seem to bode well for relationship longevity. I mean, if you're dating Jessica Simpson, are you someone who's really looking for a deep, meaningful relationship?

I'm for reals, dude. BURY YOU.

FIND MORE JENNIFER ANISTON AND JOHN MAYER ROMANCE RUMORS AT THIS LINK!

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Jennifer Aniston & John Mayer, Sittin' In A Tree

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Comments (2)

1

john mayer and jen aniston... I dunno.

27

smiley1843 5/1/08

2

well - I hope he's the one for her. she's been looking for a long time.

77

pARtyGal184 5/1/08